Recently I have even been called out (in the wedding blog world) for advocating creativity and individuality when my own wedding was so “cookie-cutter.”
I know that making your wedding one-of-a-kind and unique is the trendy thing to do these days. However, J and my wedding was fairly traditional and conservative.
Thinking back to our wedding day and the months preceding the event, I can think of three explanations why.
Our venue provided everything.
We would’ve had to do additional work, and/or pay extra fees in order to incorporate elements that were unique to our personalities. We knew this was a trade-off when deciding on this venue; however, their food was to die for (people are still talking about how awesome the food was at our wedding!) and in the end, our stomaches and laziness took over.
As much as we wanted to elope, or have a backyard BBQ wedding, our parents would’ve murdered us.
Correction: murdered us in such ways so that there were no conspicuous marks on our bodies, then put on the wedding themselves in the style of Weekend at Bernie’s.
We are actually pretty conservative when it comes to beliefs and core values.
Yes, this may come as a surprise to some, especially since we have such a diverse group of friends. This probably holds true more for J, because I myself was surprised when we first became close and I discovered his conservative standards.
It is for these reasons that we decided to go the traditional route for our wedding, and decided upon the traditional vows. They represented who we are as a couple, not based on others’ perceptions of us.
I resent the term “cookie-cutter wedding” for the same reason people look down upon stay-at-home moms in the name of feminism.
To me, feminism is about having a choice, not about going against the traditional/old feminine roles. In the same way, throwing a kick-ass wedding should not be about going against the traditional norms; rather, it should be about going with your preferences and embracing what works for you and your loved ones.
So if having our wedding in a ballroom, wearing a poofy white dress, and reciting traditional wedding vows is what made me happy and ultimately represented us, who is anyone to look down on us?