I am pretty sure that I do not need a lactation consultant.
Claire has a perfectly good latch. I do not have any supply issues. I am comfortable in different breastfeeding positions. I have read La Leche League’s The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding front to back, and am always visiting breastfeeding support forums, so I am certainly informed.
What I do have is an impatient and lazy suckler.
One out of every five times, she will take from my breast and drink for a good 10+ minutes straight.
It is only the other four out of five times that she will only suck for a minute or two, tire of it (because it’s more work than drinking from a bottle), then proceed to start screaming. And the girl must have inherited my stubbornness, because once the screaming starts she will refuse to eat from the breast for the rest of that session.
So unless you think I need to pay someone $180+ (that is the going rate for a home visit by a lactation consultant in my area) to sit there to be a cheerleader, no I do not need a lactation consultant.
What I need is a lot of time and patience — and perhaps a bit of stubbornness on my part too. What I need is some time alone with just the baby and myself, so that I do not feel pressured, or feel bad for anyone who might be subjected to the crying.
I am pretty certain that if I stay gung-ho and only offer my breasts for a full 24 hours, no bottles allowed, Claire will need to admit defeat and surrender.
I have asked J to ask his parents not to come over on Wednesday for this purpose.
J asked if I would like him to work from home, and I told him no.
Wednesday will be a day for just me and Claire. A day when I will be adamant about teaching my baby to associate my breasts to eating, to prefer my breasts over any bottle.
And a day filled with many tears, to be sure.
Please wish me luck.