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Trying to Do What’s Best

Claire has had thrush on and off for about a month now, (I don’t know why doctors prescribe Nystatin when it only works in about 50% of thrush cases) and it looks like it’s spread to my boobs too.

So now I am battling both thrush and mastitis.

Perhaps I had thrush first which caused the mastitis? Or did my weakened immune system from the mastitis help the thrush thrive in my breasts?

Either way, I’m friggin exhausted, in pain all the time, and I can barely hold my own baby due to anything even remotely brushing against my nipples or right breast causing red, hot searing pain throughout my chest.

Yesterday I got a bottle of grapefruit seed extract oil and have been treating both Claire’s mouth and my nipples with the method described here. I can already see an improvement to Claire’s tongue overnight (a PSA to all mothers who are dealing with thrush: skip the Nystatin and go straight to grapefruit seed extract!), but I am still experiencing pain in my nipples and through my breasts whenever they are drained.

As for the mastitis, the antibiotics that the doctor prescribed have lowered my fever, but my right breast still remains a bit warmer than the left and the painful lump remains.

Want to hear something funny? The antibiotics, which kill all bacteria — good or bad, are supposed to keep me at a higher risk for thrush. It’s like a fun, vicious cycle!

Sigh.

Between these two infections, all the trouble I have had breastfeeding in the first few weeks of Claire’s life, the side effects I continue to experience from breastfeeding, and — this is a new one — discovering recently that my breast milk seems to give Claire horrible gas (no matter my diet) while she is fine whenever she drinks formula, I am so ready to throw in the towel and quit. I want to wean now.

But then I see ads like this and it makes me feel horribly guilty for even considering quitting:

 

It’s only been six weeks. Please tell me that it will get better.

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