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Six Random Thoughts

The Geek in Heels household is in a bit of disarray at the moment. J is sick. I am still suffering from insomnia (and am a walking zombie as a result). I sent Comang to stay with my sister for a couple of days while we try to recover and we’re missing him dearly. And I have a gazillion thoughts running through my head at all times…

So I figured, why not write about some of these thoughts?

1.  My hair smells like perm chemicals and I like it. I can’t stand most perfume scents, but I have never had a problem with perm chemicals. Or the smell of gasoline. Why am I so weird? (I’ll try to post pictures of my new hair tomorrow. I don’t want to take a picture today because I can’t wash my hair for at least 24 hours and so it’s a royal mess right now.)

2.  I think I have gone to the bathroom more than 20 times today. And I can’t remember the last time I had a long, satisfying pee.

3.  I want to cry whenever I see our guest room, which is currently overflowing with boxes and bins and is a complete mess. We can’t move anything down to our storage unit until our condo’s management company cashes our first check, and they confirmed this morning that they still haven’t received it. I hate that our management company always takes forever to sort their mail and only goes to the bank once in a while to cash checks. We can’t do ANYTHING to the nursery until this stuff is moved out.

4.  Seeing this made me smile today, because I just know that J will give all boys a hard time when it comes to our daughter:

5.  My mom calls me every day, sometimes several times a day, to see how I’m doing. On one hand, I want to scream, “WE WILL LET YOU KNOW IF ANYTHING’S HAPPENING.” On the other, I’m grateful because she’s the only one who calls me regularly. I have turned into the lonely pregnant woman again and I’ve been really down lately. I do not know anyone else in real life who is pregnant, and most of my girlfriends are still single. So far, only about 5 people have RSVPed “yes” to the baby shower and they are all family members. (And I know that it may seem like I’m sad no one will buy us gifts, but I honestly don’t care if we do not receive any gifts…I’m just sad that so few people seem to want to come celebrate the baby with us.) I have been trying to make some new friends whose lives are at similar stages as mine, but it’s difficult when even walking around is physically painful. Pity party for one, please.

6.  I realize that the majority of these thoughts are negative ones where I am complaining and/or b*tching. I apologize for this — I’ve just been so tired, cranky, and emotional lately. I took pride in myself through the pregnancy for not turning into a crazy pregnant lady who takes everything too personally and cries over every little thing, but it seems that the stereotype has finally caught up with me in the past month or so. All I can do is tell myself to keep looking forward, and stay strong for our little girl.

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