Today was to be the due date of our lost baby. I will never forget you and will always hold you close to my heart. I look forward to the day when I can meet you in heaven, when I can finally hold you in my arms and tell you face to face that I love you. Dear Lord, I would have loved to hold my baby in my lap and tell her all about you...
Continue readingHave I mentioned that I've been very self-conscious about my looks these past few months? Only about a dozen or so times! Along with the almost-20 lbs I've stacked on, pregnancy has also changed my body chemistry so much to a point where my old tried-and-true beauty products just have not been cutting it. My regular facewash has become too drying. My moisturizer seems too light. I have even (embarrassingly) developed a case of bacne. The problems above didn't bother me too much. I am supposed to be on the hunt for a new facewash anyway because the line has been discontinued. I can always try another moisturizer from Clarins (my go-to skincare company) once my current bottle of lotion runs out. I have...
Continue readingJ and I are not patient people. So when we learned yesterday that we would need to wait 4 more weeks — as opposed to the 2 as we had originally believed — to find out the gender of our baby, we both looked like this: (I know, I know. I can imagine all the parents out there thinking, "If they can't wait a measly 2 weeks for this milestone in their child's life, they have another thing coming when the child is born.") So although I had already brought up the idea of a 3D/4D ultrasound to J which he vetoed as a "waste of money for something that looks a bit freaky," I suggested it once more so that...
Continue readingEarly this morning I went in to have my blood drawn for my AFP. I had been told at my last appointment that today would be just the blood draw, and that I will come in two weeks later for a regular check-up. Well, imagine my surprise when the visit turned into a full check-up! I was able to meet the third and final doctor at my OB practice today, and he was warm and friendly as expected. However, when I asked him if we would be able to tell the sex of the baby today, he didn't even bother and said, "It's still too early," when I know full well that external sex organs have been distinguishable for at least a...
Continue readingTwo years ago today, J and I said "I do" in front of 236 of our closest friends and family. In those two years, we have never taken a vacation together (with the exception of our honeymoon). I stopped working full-time. J got laid off and remained unemployed for three, financially tumultuous months. We lost a family member. We gained a new one in our dog Comang. We conceived, and lost a baby. We conceived another baby after four months of trying, and I am now 16 weeks pregnant with who will hopefully become our first live child. Having been together for so long before marriage, I don't think J and I ever had a "honeymoon period." In fact, our marriage started...
Continue reading