Jan 22, 2011  •  In Asian, Funny, Personal

The Aging Process of Asian Women

One of the biggest stereotypes about Asian women (aside from the notion that we are meek, timid creatures who are sexual slaves in the bedroom) is that we never seem to age, or age at a much slower rate than the rest of the population. And wouldn’t you know it — here is a funny cartoon to show just that:

(image source)

While I’m not so sure about other Asian women, I can attest that now, at the age of 30, I am starting to notice signs of aging. I am very lucky that I have not yet developed wrinkles; however, I am beginning to get plagued by dry patches of skin and age spots. My metabolism is nowhere near where it was when I was in my late teens and early twenties (and I thought I was FAT back then…what I wouldn’t give to have the body I had ten years ago!), I get tired much more easily, and the 30+ years of bad posture is catching up to me in the way of nightly backaches.

That being said, I must admit that I am often mistaken for being younger — people are always surprised when I tell them my actual age, and I guess I have my (Asian?) genes to thank for that, because God knows I’ve treated by body like crap.

I dug up this old photo from 2001 (friend’s face marked out in respect for her privacy):

It is undeniable that I look younger (and I can’t help noticing how much thinner I was back then…sigh), but I’m not sure that I look an entire decade younger than I do now.

What do you think? Do you agree with the stereotype that Asian women never seem to age (or at least until they hit menopause, as depicted in the cartoon above)?

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140 Responses to “The Aging Process of Asian Women”

  1. wolfgang3424 says:

    I have lived in Asia for 15 years and my wife is Asian. I agree that Asian women take much better care to stay away from the sun. There is the Asian ledge however. Many women, where I live, look perpetually 20 years old until they hit the age of 40 then its like they age overnight. It is not necessarily wrinkles, but their face starts to loose it’s youthful appearance. They become very pallid. I work in biomechanics and kinesiolgy so I notice bodies more than faces. Asian womens bodies, at least in South East Asia, never have much muscle tone but after 40, even if they appear thin, they have no muscle whatsoever. If you were to squeeze many of their arms it would feel like you are squeezing a sponge until you touched their bone. I think this has a lot to do with diet and, as someone else mentioned, their overall unwillingness to exercise. I do think that Asians have good genes but I think that they usually catch up with their Caucasian counterparts in the second part of their lives.

    • tjaustin says:

      Wow. You comments are right on. And so is the cartoon, in my opinion. Perhaps a bit dramatized, but essentially correct. I’m a caucasian male and have only dated/lived with Asian females for the past thirty years. I love their culture and how they treat partners, but they do “all of a sudden” just start looking older in many ways. And yes, for some reason they don’t seem to want to exercise. I think they get the best of it for the first fifty years of their lives, and then all “evens out” as they don’t age that well thereafter. Oh well, interesting observation, but I don’t know why it really matters.

  2. EastBayMan says:

    I’ve been married to an Asian woman (but born in California) for 30 years now, and she rapidly began to show her age at menopause.
    We’re the same age and we met in our early 30’s, and married shortly after. Our wonderful Eurasian children are now grown up, out of college and out of the house.
    But when I met my wife, I felt that she was the most beautiful, most exotic woman I had ever met. And that’s an understatement. She was an absolute bombshell, an Asian siren, and insanely beautiful -and intelligent, and always fun to be with.
    At the time, I was a single, college educated bachelor living in San Francisco. And I drove a sports car and dated and loved women -many women, and could have even married into wealth. But back where I came from, back east, there’s a wise old saying: “Those who marry into wealth end up earning every goddamn penny of it.”
    Even in her mid-50s, my beautiful Asian wife was quite striking, and never ceased to get more than her share of looks when in public.
    But she finally entered menopause in her late 50s, and definitely shows it, as in your humorous cartoon. Although there’s no medical issues in her health (except for being 60), her body has filled out and her face is now old and puffy.
    But I still love her with all my heart, and we still never cease to have fun together, no matter what activity we’re doing. We’re like a close brother and sister in our relationship. And we are still passionate with other in the bedroom, we just do it less.
    So my advice to you guys: Don’t worry about it, and just follow your heart and get married. And don’t fall for the crude and stupid line: “Look at her mother, and then decide if you really want that later in life.”
    Hopefully, a man mellows out as he gets older, and true love, combined with a sense of humor, makes the physical appearance of a woman less and less important.

  3. David says:

    I am white British and 53 years old, most of my colleagues are of a similar age. We work in peoples homes on a daily basis. Most customers are totally knocked sideways when they realise that I am 53, most guessing around 35 – 38, never more than 40. A Thai couple I know well asked me to travel with them to visit their families in Bangkok and Pattaya. The wife aged 30, introduced me to her younger sister aged 28. I honestly thought she was 14, 15. But the biggest shock was when I was introduced to her mum. Kah, (pronounced “Cair”), is 56, post menopause, 48kg, 150cm, has boobs and a bum, practices ballroom dancing, teaches classical Thai dancing and political science, avoids the sun like a vampire lol, but, BUT I thought my friends English had let her down. I honestly thought I was being introduced to another sister of about 25. Well that was a year ago, she has visited me and my family, I have visited Kah in Bangkok again. And things are looking very very rosy.

  4. Yes, great !!! i agree asian women want to stay young.

    • Anna Hilton says:

      Yeah, thats was i mean

    • tjaustin says:

      Dated them all my life. They not only try to keep looking younger, they spend hours on end trying to get everything “just right”. And of course that’s a losing battle at some point. The one’s I know just refuse to accept aging gracefully, and put in more and more hours of plucking, makeup, trying on clothes, and seeming desperate to make youth happen again. Of course it won’t. I’m sure it is frustrating when that is a primary goal but not an attainable one. Everyone ages. I think they’d be happier accepting life for what it is, not what they want it to be.

      I have nothing against trying to look nice. But when it gets to be an obsession, that’s just too far to take it.

      The very high heels and tight jeans/skirts on a 60+ year old woman, just doesn’t look right. And they can’t be told any different. I’ve tried, diplomatically. Attractiveness turns to gaudiness/cheapness when they try too hard. Reason becomes replaced with desperation. Sad. I love her just the way she is, not what she continues to try to be, which is literally impossible.

  5. lyn evans says:

    Boy, talk about a typical insecure Asian women very coyly looking for affirmation of her attractiveness?

    ‘What do you think?….do you agree with the stereotype?…i’m not sure I look an entire decade older…DO I?’

    of course she’s gonna get lots of asiaphile men telling her exactly what she wants to here…but then, I suppose that’s why she and so many other Asian women start blogs like this in the first place…because they all want to meet non-Asian men. They pretend they are here for ‘discussion’ but they know full how to ensure the responses are generally in their favor. Like have you ever noticed how many Asian women out there have blogs talking about the supposedly rampant ‘yellow fever’? Meanwhile, 99% of these very same women are involved with…yup, you guessed it…NON-Asian men. But you gotta admit these women are very sly: talk about yellow fever and make everybody think it’s the men chasing the Asian women, and then no one will think to question HER, and HER motivations for being with a non-Asian man. As they say it takes two to tango. Are the guys really chasing them, or are the men simply taking the Asian women up on what they so freely offer to any and all NON-Asian males? I’d say that Asian women with white fever is far more rampant than non-Asian men with yellow fever. Some guys simply want a woman, and many guys know that if they are white, they will have to work MUCH less harder to get an Asian woman, versus a white woman.

    • Wow, I dunno about you, but most Asian women I know are happily married to, or in serious relationships with men of all races. I don’t talk about “yellow fever” on this blog, and if you click on over to my profile, you’ll see that I’m married to an Asian man. The way that you go off on this topic just makes it seem like you’re the one with an issue here, tbh. 🙂

      As for your theory that I’m just seeking validation, I guess I am, to some extent. But aren’t all bloggers seeking some sort of validation? Why else would they post their thoughts for all the world to see?

      That being said, the intent of this post was certainly not to ask strangers to come comment on how young I look — that question at the end is purely rhetorical. And I have actually NOT gotten “lots of asiaphile men telling her exactly what she wants to here”…you can read through the comments on this post and see that most people comment on the comic (which is exactly what I wanted from this post in the first place!). But thanks for the comment. It’s always interesting to hear different thoughts on a topic.

      • misses wah says:

        my Asian daughter and my Asian self had the biggest laugh over your photo which seems true with all of the Asians that we know 🙂

      • stephen says:

        well to start, i think you look pretty,i like your thinking’ my gf is asian thai,my last 4 have been asian,but as with any women or man we seek something different that will make us seal the deal,and we can except for life,even with all the misgivings that we all have ,and hope that she or he can live with,i really think asian women are more forgiving to our faults than most american women of non asian,been there done that too’married 2 times, dated many ,oh’just to let you know i was the one to end the 2 ex’wifes,and was tired of trying to find the one here,there motives where almost all the same, so i went on my quest els where and i did meet some asian women i could not live with,but soon found the one i can she is great,and much smarter than me ‘but loves me way more than any women i ever been with.keep up the blog its great.

    • Legolas says:

      You nailed it. It’s White fever. It’s pretty apparent to everyone by now.

      As most people already know…There’s a huge number of East Asian women who want to be aligned with white culture. Many of these women have enormous inferiority complexes. East Asian culture has ingrained in its women that white skin is highly prized. What’s sad is that it takes many generations to rid the asian features from their mixed children because the asian genes are so strong. You’re absolutely correct about how white men know they really don’t have to try very hard when there are so many east asian women who are easy, ready and willing.

      • Whitefeverlololol says:

        Thanks for the good laugh. Yes, asian women like white skin, but no, not from white people lol. women who stays indoor more have fairer skin (not WHITE as in WHITE women). They don’t work outside as much as their darker skin counterparts. Meaning? They are people with high class. So yes, we favor white skin, not because we want to be other race.

      • Ben says:

        Your observation is correct, but your theory/ assumption is partially wrong. A lot of Asian woman wanted to stay pale because in the past, royal family members/ rich people are often pale. it is because they never have to do any manual labor work. thus, pale skin became the symbol of prestige. However, in theory, your assumption can be correct, esp when talking about the construction of “beauty” and how its defined. in that area, the west dominates cultural production, with Hollywood films etc. this means that whilst your theory on “inferiority complexes” can be correct, it is not the main reason.

    • annie says:

      dont be jelly

  6. thomas morris says:

    my asianwife is still very good looking she is over 65 and people cant belive it think shes a lot younger

  7. um says:

    First, I dont get this stereotype at all. I lived in Korea, I got use yo seeing asian faces, and I am married to an asian. I can easily and accurately guess how old asians are and am generally am right. The 30ish year old Korean women in my area LOOK their age. They certainly look no where near 20s. And Ive seen plenty of asian women look far older then their age, ma,y loook their age, and some younger then their age. And thats as equally true with non asian women.

    If I had to guess the age of the woman in the picture, Id say 32ish. She looks in her 30s, she has small eyes, a huge forehead, and does not look youthful at all. Only asianphile fetishist are going to validate this womans ego.

    • I’m guessing that “the woman” you’re referring to is me (the author of this post and owner of this blog)? I’m not sure which picture you used in order to try to guess my age, but thank you, because I’m 34. 🙂 I *think* the picture you used was my profile picture, and if that’s the case, I want to make it clear that I chose that photo as my main picture because it makes me look a bit older than I look in most other pictures. (And I want to be taken more professionally in meetups and events for my blog. *shrug*) If you want a more accurate representation of what I look like, there are some recent pictures of me in my latest post: https://www.geekinheels.com/2015/01/17/ive-been-a-bad-bad-blogger.html So feel free to judge away with those pics!

      (And honestly, considering the fact that I am 34 years old with 2 kids, I’m just happy if I don’t get called an ajumma. 😀 )

      • jen says:

        hahaha! I have the same impression of the aging process of Asian women!!! At 40, I definitely look older now than in my 20’s and 30’s but haven’t transformed into an ajumma yet. Is this our future??? I wish I needed glasses, I think big funky black frames are the best solution for old faces 😉

    • blahblah says:

      I think this is a big generalization that Asians age well. There’s an element of truth to it biologically because Asians tend to have thicker skin with more pigment, hence less photo aging. However, I think there’s a lot of variation. I have some friends who are Asian and look remarkably young. Then I have other friends who look their age or look much older than their age.
      This picture is pretty funny, but there’s also some truth to it. Asians don’t age in the same way as Caucasians. Caucasians tend to age due to UV exposure and this translates to wrinkles. Asians don’t seem to get as much wrinkles but are prone to pronounced sagging and skin discoloration / age spots.

    • Sally says:

      The girli in the picture is not old. Has nice skin. what’s wrong with a big forehead? Better brain and more intelligence. Sounds like someone here is jealous.

      Women that have an easily life may age less. Having to raise chlldren can get stress to your life and most of the time age a person. I agree with the person that wrote you see young looking Asians, Asians that look their age, and Asians that look older than their age. Women are all the same as long as the stay out of the sun and takes better care of themselves. Regular exercises and eating right is the key, but most women are using botox and skln fillers in their 40’s to keep the appearance up. . with white women due to their think skin will get wrinkles fast, so they get face lifts as young as late 30’s to early 40’s. As for Asian women, I do believe some of their youthful appearance in their late 40’s and beyond is more of plastic surgery such as face lifts. You don’t see these young looking Asain women working in super markets that is in their 40’s looking too good. They cannot afford to get skin fillers and most likely they aren’t married to anyone that can afford it.

  8. Arshad Pahad says:

    I think Asian women are extremely beautiful. I live in South Africa and am of Indian descent but love my numerous trips to Hong Kong, and my wife totally agrees that Asian women are gorgeous. They do tend to age as if they fell off a cliff but I think it’s really an exercise thing. But who really cares? They’re gorgeous.

  9. EnjoyingLife says:

    I stumbled upon this page while researching “Asian skin + menopause”. Being 53 and Chinese, yes, the cartoon pretty much says it all for me. If I remember correctly, one day about a year ago, I looked at the mirror and went “What the %&*( happened here?” Haha, I hope my downhill slide post 60 will not be as bad as depicted as I am physically active (tennis, golf, hiking, skiing). However, since I like being outdoors, even with sunscreen use I still get a lot of pigmentation which is the hallmark of aging in Asian skin, my Caucasian husband of 30+ years gets wrinkles instead, not sure which is better/worse, haha. I also enjoy a few drinks when we go out, staying up late now and then, neither helps with my complexion. My mother had absolutely beautiful skin till the day she passed at 85, not a spot, not a wrinkle, but she lived a much more disciplined life. So, am I worried about what I see in the mirror? Well, life is too short, when people my age are dying, I am not overly concerned about my neck sagging. But, it doesn’t mean I won’t try to understand and remedy the situation, I’ll probably be around for another 30 years, maybe I’ll replace the mirror with a digital phone frame, haha.

  10. Muldo Fercher says:

    I think Asian women stay attractive for much longer than any other race, however once the magic wears off they are just as unattractive as their peers in other races. Be glad you are an Asian female, the outlook for Asian males is grim in their youth, shifts from grim to desolate in their 30s and ends devastatingly hopeless by the time they turn 50. Hence the insistence to marry young girls while they can and that is not easy as most Asian girls abroad have better choices. That said yes Asian genes do convey a more appealing appearance for a longer time but only in the female and when the magic wears off the appeal dissipates almost over night.

  11. M. Tibett says:

    All of you are wrong! Black women age the slowest although Asian women have the advantage of being thinner, which gives that youthfulness. Asian women tend to be insecure while at the same time they know Western men are desperate for a woman that doesn’t have a 50 inch waistline and think she is God’s gift to a man. White, Black and Hispanic woman are fat, plain and simple. At least in America. So you are right, Asian women are definitely the way to go if you don’t want to spend your life with the oversized warthogs called females over here. Thank goodness I met a Japanese professional lady in school who married me and likes to workout. She is not beautiful but I am a body guy so face doesn’t matter that much to me.
    Guys, so not marry these fat hogs here. As soon as they stick that claim flag in your butt hole and push out a kid, you are stuck with a fat grumpy demanding whale forever. I know so many guys go on multiple deployments just to get away from their buffalo beast at home. Ugh!
    The chick that started this blog. Not bad, but I suggest hitting the gym to tone up and you will look very good for the next 25 years.

    • Meme says:

      I agreed with M.Tibett, very well said and funnu.So guys
      do you want to stuck in with the buffaloes beast forever.

  12. They also say that about black people. So Asian people I feel u and let’s talk about it. Also Just look at the other stereotypes out there. But stuff like Glee and the Kleenex commercial with that fat kid comforting the crying girl. It’s about time. FoxKids® Rocks Kids.

  13. Erin Chia Ling Wu says:

    As a middle aged woman going through menopause, the only problem I’ve faced was having an androgynous face and body. Wrinkles really haven’t been a problem – my skin is fine. But having always looked like a boy, I’ve never really been flirted with by men.

  14. Ab says:

    The ELBOWS… they never lie.

    P.S. – LOL at the age progression cartoon chart 😀

  15. Noriko says:

    I am a Japanese female, 46 yrs and always mistook for younger age. It’s usually somewhere between ” I thought you were a student !” ( I work at a University) or around up to 30 something.
    I laughed at the cartoon because I grew up seeing those old ladies with tight perms and loud voices. Until I moved to America I never knew there was a term “Yellow Fever” (I guess from the movie Jungle Fever?).
    My hubby is African American and although he adores my Asian features, I’m sure he is noticing my aging faces and body.
    I also hate Asian girls who go out with white guys for money and status. They would date black guys but they won’t marry them. I see rich white celebs with aging Asian spouses. I saw Soon-Ye who is with Woody Allen. She looked very old even though she could use a fortune to correct her face.

  16. brian knight says:

    Hey what a great blog I am married to an asian lady and once menopause came she change completely not only to me but her own biological children, she is very hardworking even now but has developed the theory that every one is out to get her money and property. I can’t talk to any one of the opposite sex because either I disrespect her or having an affair with them Oh for the pre menopause days when she was so much more in tune with the world.She is 55 years of age and whilst showing the first signs of aging she is still very beautiful

  17. IvyL says:

    Hey, no they don’t hold up like darker skinned women. Sorry. And then they get a hump in the back sometimes. At 20-25 okay. But after 35 it’s all downhill. They wrinkle horrible. Saggy booty, saggy face. Look at some of the Asian news women with no work done. Even with facial work done they still look horrible.
    Go ahead go for it guys lol

  18. Warren Mundell says:

    My 60 year old chinese wife has no wrinkles, weights under 50 klg, She keeps sun off herself mostly.
    Eat properly, and lots of walking. I love her mind also.

  19. John says:

    Oh please just fuck off.

  20. Kaya says:

    Only” white pride” losers will always have the most negative things to say about any race on earth anyway. With a caucasian wife so fat because of eating too much mcdonalds.

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