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Pregnancy

Weeks 12 & 13

Apr 01. 2010

I have been avoiding my weekly updates for two reasons: We found out that we had lost our first baby at 12 weeks, so I wanted to make sure that "the jinxed week" would go by without a problem. As April approaches, I have been getting more and more depressed. I've been experiencing overwhelming guilt for doing this to the baby in my stomach, and I feel like a horrible mother. But lately, all the horrible feelings from my miscarriage has been rushing back and I am in a relapse of the grieving period. I am so, so sorry, baby. I apologize in advance if you end up reading this years down the road, and feel cheated of all the love and attention that...

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Geek in Heels
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Asian, Personal, Relationships

Cultural Expectations of Family

Apr 01. 2010

As mentioned in my last post, my in-laws (J's parents) will be visiting for 1.5 months starting this weekend. J's parents live in Hong Kong, so we only get to see them a handful of times a year. However, each visit lasts at least a couple of weeks — the longest of which was 5 months, starting two months before our wedding in 2008. That's right. My in-laws stayed with us for 3 months directly after our wedding. I won't lie and tell you that it was a piece of cake. I was stressed from wedding planning, moving to a new place, leaving my own family and adjusting to a new life. I refused to have sex with J with his parents in...

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Geek in Heels
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Personal, Pregnancy

As “That Month” Approaches…

Mar 31. 2010

I am officially in my second trimester and feeling great. I check my baby's heartbeat with a fetal doppler every few days and know that it's doing okay. But as "that month" approaches, I can't help but be depressed. The nursery would be almost fully prepared. I should be waddling around with my stomach "out to there." I would have been excitedly awaiting the birth of my little one in just a few weeks, not months. The month of April will be hell for me; I just know it. J will be busy at work with the big project that isn't scheduled to finish until the next month. My in-laws have decided to visit for 1.5...

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Geek in Heels
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Personal

How I’m Still Reaping the Benefits of Having Been in a Sorority in College

Mar 29. 2010

I have mentioned in the past that I was in a sorority during my college years. And while I did not particularly like my experience at JHU, being a part of that sorority was the best part of college life. In fact, if it weren't for alpha Kappa Delta Phi (aKDPhi), I'm pretty certain that I would've transferred to another school. I know that many people place negative connotations with the college greek system. Hazing. Binge-drinking. Promiscuity. Bad grades. And although there are always stories to back up these claims, it is my belief that the college greek system is what you put into it. My experience with aKDPhi was such a positive influence on my life that I wouldn't be the...

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Geek in Heels
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