Mar 21, 2010  •  In Personal, Pregnancy

Ashamed of My Weight Gain

I have not written anything about weight gain so far…because I am so ashamed of it.

Although I had morning sickness with my last pregnancy, I still had a tremendous appetite and ate everything in sight. So when I lost the baby at 12 weeks, I was already 5 lbs over my normal weight.

The miscarriage made me severely depressed and I ended up gaining another 5 lbs in 3 months.

So I entered this pregnancy already 10 lbs over my normal weight. And although I haven’t been eating any more or less, I still have been gaining weight like crazy.

We do not have a functioning scale at home (the one in the bathroom is broken and I still don’t know why we haven’t thrown it away) so I was shocked when at my last OB appointment, I was already up 10 lbs. That’s 10 lbs on top of the other 10.

Imagine an extra 20 lbs on a petite 5’1″ girl. NOT pretty.

Sometimes I like to chalk it up to my own body doing what it needs to do. I’m the type of person who gains anywhere from 3-6 lbs in water weight when I’m PMSing, only to lose it all when my period ends. I also like to tell myself that my breasts must account for A LOT of the weight, because not only are they up a bit more than an entire cup size, they are firm and dense.

But no matter what I tell myself, the fact remains that I am way over the recommended 2-3 lbs weight gain during the first trimester. It also doesn’t help when I keep reading stories about other pregnant ladies who aren’t gaining any weight, or actually lost weight during their first trimesters.

Purposely losing weight is not recommended for pregnant women, even if you are obese. So as much as I want to go on a diet and exercise plan to try to lose some of this extra poundage, I know that it is not healthy for the baby.

Right now, the best I can hope for is that the weight gain will taper off in the second trimester. I haven’t been exercising much for fear of losing the baby, but since the weather has gotten nicer I have started to take hour-long walks with Comang on the promenade near our house. I also plan on doing Shiva Rea’s Prenatal Yoga and Summer Sanders’ Prenatal Workout starting this week, as I enter my 12th week.

My mother told me that she gained a tremendous amount of weight with both me and sister, but was able to easily lose all the weight after birth. Since my body type is very similar to hers, I’m sincerely hoping that I’m the same way.

My doctor has yet to comment on my weight gain, which I’m seeing as a good sign. J continually tells me that I’m now more beautiful than ever and I’d like to believe him. Just as long as I’m not having any adverse side effects from the weight gain and the baby is healthy, I should be happy, right?

How much weight did my fellow mommy readers gain in your first trimester? Should I be more concerned?

All I know is that after the baby is born, I am going on a strict weight-loss plan…

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7 Responses to “Ashamed of My Weight Gain”

  1. kalen says:

    I can’t remember exactly how much I gained in the first trimester – 3 or 4 lbs I think? Overall, I’ve gained about 16 or so lbs, and I’ll be 25 weeks on Tuesday.

    Here’s the thing, though. I gained 10 lbs after we lost our first pregnancy, too. And it made this pregnancy SO MUCH EASIER and healthier. Honestly. I felt totally better this pregnancy because of it. It was just like you said – my body did what it needed to do. My friend Jess also lost a pregnancy, gained weight, then got pregnant & seemed to handle her next pregnancy better. So maybe we were being told that we were too little to begin with?

    Also – don’t fret too much because yes, a lot of women lose weight in the first trimester, but then pack it on in the 3rd. Some women don’t ever gain hardly any. Some gain 70+ lbs… it just depends. Eat healthy. Take walks. Let go. You’re going to look beautiful pregnant, and you were so small to begin with, that the extra weight is not going to look bad on you!

    All that being said, I know (as a little person too @ 5’2") that I’d be a little stressed/worried, too, but I just want to send you lots of encouragement and positive vibes. This is one of the only times in our lives we can be chubz & have a really great excuse! 😛

    <3 My loves to you, pretty woman!

  2. Ashley says:

    I’m on the opposite end, as I’ve gained maybe 2-3 pounds, tops (at 5’0, too). I’m 17 weeks, and definitely starting to show. I’m eating healthy and taking walks and trying to stay active, but I’ve never been able to gain weight. At first I was really concerned, because I thought, "there’s something growing inside of me, shouldn’t I weigh more?" But I realized, as long as I feel great, and I’m eating right, my body will also do what it needs to do.

    You should absolutely not feel ashamed at all about weight gain during pregnancy. Every pregnant woman is beautiful, and a little extra padding is certainly nothing to be ashamed of. I’m sure you look lovely. 🙂

  3. Bridget says:

    hello, as mentioned in a past comment, i’m 12 wks also and i’ve gained 7lbs so far. not proud of my weight gain, but that’s the way is goes. the way i see it, after baby/breastfeeding will be the time for dieting. i haven’t started walking, but really want to. my back has taken on it’s prego curve (early!) and it hurts when i walk. (i’d have to look back at our first child to see how much weight i gained)

  4. shortie says:

    Jenny, you are not alone. When we first started trying, I was about 128-130lbs. Way skinny, leftover from the stress and financial limitations of our wedding. After my two losses, I gained about 5lbs. When I got pregnant with baby girl in October, I weighed 140 lbs – totally healthy for my height (5’9"). With bed rest from my back injury right away, then continued bed rest because of my placenta bleeding, then continued bed rest with my early contractions from SPD, I could, and have, gain a ton of weight from eating really, really well (for a change).

    First trimester I gained about 7 lbs, and now, at almost 23 weeks, I’m 166 lbs. That’s 26 lbs in 23 weeks. Holy moly. I try not to get down about it, but I’ve always been very slender, so it’s disconcerting to see rolls and chub. The doctor isn’t concerned at all. I try to focus on my healthy girl – like you said, my body knows what it’s doing. I’d rather be chubby and have a healthy baby, then be my post-wedding weight and have a third loss, you know?

  5. Jenna says:

    I’m at 37 weeks and 55 lbs gained, and at this point I’m just grateful the weight gain tapered off during the third trimester so I won’t have a 70-80 lb gain! I’ve gained about 1.5 lbs/week average.

    I wish I could tell you you won’t mind the gain later, but I’ve never been one to sugar coat things. I’m pretty miserable and ready to have my body back.

    I still wouldn’t give it up for anything though. So worth it.

  6. Helene HT says:

    hihi jenny, i’ve been reading ur blogs since the xanga time. since i was real busy in the past months, i stopped for a while and it was just when u lost ur 1st baby. but then when i read again lately, i found that u’r pregnant again! i’m so so sooooooo happy for youuuuuuuuuuu =DDDDDD tho i don’t know u in person, i feel like i’ve known u forever so i’m really thrilled to know that u’r having another baby so quickly! congratulations~~~

    actually i’m also pregnant myself and it’s entering the 8th week now. we haven’t told a lot of ppl apart from our families and a few best friends. in fact, almost half of my friends lost their 1st one so…. well i’m not being pessimistic, just wanna announce the news when it gets more stable.

  7. Emily says:

    aw sweetie, keep eating healthy, going for walks, and yoga, that’s all you can do. your body will do what it’s meant to do unless you put a bunch of, say, chimichangas in it for weeks on end. My pregnant friends seem to love mexican food…=]

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