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Wednesday Rewind: The 10 Levels of Intimacy in Today’s Communication

Once in a while, when I get bored, I like to look through the archives of this blog and reflect upon (and laugh at!) all the things I have shared with the web over the years. Because, heck, after 1,801 posts, even I don't remember everything. There's also the braggart in me who likes to shout, "Hey! I once wrote this years ago! You should go check it out because I think it's awesome!" (Or the part of me that likes to roll her eyes and exclaim, "Well, if you had read my blog you would know I had written about this in the past!") So I have decided to start sharing with y'all certain posts from this blog's vault of archives. I can't promise that this...

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What Are the Chances?!?!!!

Yesterday was a cool yet pleasant day. With temperatures in the low 50s and the sun shining overhead, I decided to take Aerin for a walk despite my lingering cold. (Claire was with her grandparents.) We walked the 22 blocks to my favorite children's park and I sat Aerin down on a swing. She hadn't been there since the temperatures took a dip, so she was obviously over the moon with glee. As I continued to push my giddy daughter on the swing, I noticed another mom with her baby...

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Feeling Sexy as a Mom

As long-time readers can attest, I was a late bloomer. Bullies who teased me for being different, my extremely awkward teen years, and a mixture of social ineptitude and general naïveté — combined with a first boyfriend who would tell me things like, “You’d be hot if you lost some weight” — led to my having very, very low self-esteem up to my early twenties.

Then came the summer of 2001. I had just broken free of the aforementioned relationship. I joined a gym and toned up. I was finally able to develop my own sense of style and began to favor form-fitting clothes in lieu of the baggy oversized t-shirts which had hidden my figure for the first two decades of my life.

There was a moment that summer, as I looked at my reflection in the mirror, that I finally admitted to myself, “Hey, I’m not so horrible-looking.”

I can still vividly recall the very first time a guy hit on me at a bar. I had earlier noticed the handsome stranger who sat at the table next to mine, and I couldn’t believe my luck when he sauntered over and offered to buy me a drink.

He had chosen me — over all the beautiful, skinny, scantily-clad girls in the room!

I soon partnered with my best friend, who had also recently gotten out of a long-term relationship, and began to visit the bars and clubs in NYC Koreatown — where we knew we would not be carded, as we were still just shy of legal drinking age — more frequently.

Sometimes we would hit the bars 3, 4 times a week. And did I mention that my friend is a gorgeous babe who used to model? (Another reason for my low self-esteem: I have very attractive girlfriends.) I can’t remember a single time we went out — just us two — when we didn’t get approached by guys.

Soon, we grew cocky and even started going out without cash, confident that we’d find guys who would buy our drinks for us. (And we always did.)


New York Asians may remember a Korean club called MK. I’ve been to that place WAY too many times.

I would say that this was the period in my life when I felt the sexiest. I know that feeling sexy shouldn’t depend on attention from the opposite sex, but for me — a quiet, nerdy girl who had just gotten out of her shell — it did.