Jul 16, 2011  •  In Blogging, Personal

Someone is WRONG on the Internet

I have been blogging for over a decade now, and in that time I have certainly received hurtful and/or hateful comments. I have had my share of trolls, personal messages from particularly irate readers, as well as (empty) threats.

At first they used to bother me. A lot.

But now, I find them quite amusing.

Does something that a complete stranger writes on their personal blog bother you so much that you feel the need to continually argue your point?

To refresh the page over 90 times in an hour to see if you had gotten a response? (Yes, someone actually did this to me quite a few times.)

To link to the offending post in an online forum or social media site to ask for reinforcements? (A militant atheist used to link to my blog whenever I wrote anything regarding my religious beliefs.)

I personally find that it is completely useless to argue with someone over the internet, let alone with someone whom you’ve never met. So you know my stance on the issue.  🙂


(via xkcd)

My favorites are, by far, the comments and emails that tell me that they will stop reading my blog. These are almost always from readers who have never interacted with me before — those who I never knew were reading in the first place — so I find it a bit comical that they expect me to get upset.

Perhaps these people think that by no longer reading this blog, they are no longer supporting me financially?

The truth of the matter is that although I have recently started to monetize my blog, I probably made in the last month what I used to make in one day when I worked full-time. So no, I can do without the money and I have done without the money all this time.

Do they stop reading other blogs over differences in opinions too? Because personally, there are many, many blogs and websites I frequent that often publishes content I disagree with politically, religiously, and even sometimes morally. But I continue to visit them because I find the majority of their content interesting and/or relevant to my needs. So I find it a bit difficult to understand why others can’t do the same.

My friend Maya did a very thought-provoking post last month about Socially Conscious Shopping which sorta treads on this issue. How much do you really know about the inner workings of a company? How much do you really know about the blogger behind the blog?

I tend to share more about my life than the average person, but it is still only a slice of my life. So how do you know that I do not run a sex trafficking ring in my spare time? How do you know that I am not actually a 42-year-old man who has painstakingly created the “Geek in Heels” persona?

The answer is, you don’t.

Look, I do not expect to change the world with this blog. I am well aware that I am just one lone voice amongst millions, and that this blogs holds very negligible to no power when it comes to influencing society, laws, popular opinion, and so forth.

What I share here are my personal thoughts, tidbits from my boring life, and amusing findings I discover online.

And as far as I can tell, I am quite within my rights to continue doing exactly what I’ve been doing.  :mrgreen:

This post is not meant to dissuade people from posting disagreeable comments. I am perfectly fine with healthy debates where all parties stay respectful. Rather, this post is directed at those who insist that their opinions are right, no matter what, and will continually harrass and/or insult me or another commenter.

Why would they get so upset over the opinions of a perfect stranger?

How could they be so convinced that they have a blogger “figured out” when what they read is solely based on what the said blogger chose to share?

Do they react similarly when they find out that a friend or acquaintance holds differing opinions too, ie confront them and argue their point?

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Jul 15, 2011  •  In Marketing/Advertising, Personal

Got PMS? New Milk Ads May or May Not Be Offensive

The California Milk Processor Board along with ad agency Goodby, Silverstein & Partners have launched a new “Got Milk?” ad campaign touting the benefits of the white stuff in reducing the symptoms of PMS.

The problem? Many women — as well as men! — are finding the ads humorless and offensive. Take a look:

As someone who suffers from severe PMS (and pregnancy is like 10 straight months of PMS!), I’m not quite sure what to think about these ads. I can see the humor in them, but I can also understand how they can rub you the wrong way.

What do you think of these ads? Are you rolling your eyes and assuming that the campaign team consists of all men? Or do you think that they purposely chose to go a slightly controversial route for the extra publicity?

Via Neatorama.


Update, 7.21.2011:

I have just learned that the campaign has come to an abrupt end due to widespread outrage.

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Jul 15, 2011  •  In Aerin, Baby, Claire, Motherhood, Personal, Pregnancy

Approaching Toddlerhood, and 24 Weeks

Remember how I said that we were working on transitioning Claire from 3 naps down to 2?

She continued to hover back and forth between 2 and 3 naps for over a month. But in the end, it took a traumatic visit to the pediatrician’s office to officially push her over to the 2 nap schedule.

The lengths of her naps are still inconsistent, lasting anywhere from 30 minutes to 1 hour and 15 minutes. Her nighttime sleep has still yet to return to her pre-teething days and so she will wake up at least once per night more often than sleep all the way through. But now that she is able to stay awake for up to 3 and a half hours without going batsh*t crazy on us…our little girl is starting to become quite fun!


Since my laptop is still dead AND my phone is on the fritz,
uploading new pictures has become quite a chore. You’ll have to
make do with this cute picture of a ticklish koala for now.

We are now able to take her on short excursions without worrying too much about whether her sleep schedule will get ruined. And if she is in a good mood, she will wave “hi” and “bye” to even strangers, as evidenced by a trip to the store this week where she charmed everyone on the checkout line by waving to them.

(Her waving has become quite good now — before, she would only do it if one of us waved first. Now, she understands the words “hi” and “bye” and will wave when she hears those words.)

Don’t get me wrong. She still has her bad moments where she will just push me over the edge and reduce me to a blubbering pile of tears. But it’s like I have always suspected — I’m just not the type of person to like the early infant months that much. Having a learning, responding, interactive child is sooooo much more fun. And while J admits that even he misses her tiny baby months sometimes, I don’t miss them at all…and look forward to the upcoming years with great anticipation.

I am not looking forward to going through this all over again when BebeDeux arrives. But I remind myself that just as I am loving Claire more with each day, it will be so with BebeDeux too. And that a couple of years of hardship isn’t that long compared to the scheme of things.

Speaking of BebeDeux…

I have hit a milestone this week by reaching 24 weeks. This means that if something were to go wrong, or if I were to go into premature labor, hospitals are required by law to try to do everything in their power to keep BebeDeux alive. And while a baby born this early will most likely have complications, he/she has a good chance of survival.

Before reaching 24 weeks (in some states it is 23 weeks), hospitals have the right to refuse treatment.

I would show you a current belly picture, but my technical issues are thwarting my plans. J tells me that my stomach looks exactly the same as it did when I was pregnant with Claire, so here is the picture of my “24 weeks pregnant” picture from last year:

 I hope everyone has a great weekend!

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Jul 14, 2011  •  In Funny, Geek, Star Wars

Luke Skywalker Seeks Professional Help

Via Geek Tyrant.

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Jul 14, 2011  •  In Parenting, Personal, Relationships

Discipline Styles

J and I grew up in a culture and generation that was all for physical discipline. In fact, it was rare to find a household that did not spank/cane their children.

Our homes were not the only places for punishments either — I still remember how, having attending up to the 2nd grade in Korea, all the teachers kept a separate cane for punishments (the unspoken rules stated that we would “only” get hit on the palms of our hands or our calves)…from not doing your homework to straying from the dress code. One time, the entire class was hit three times on the palms of our hands because someone whistled during a lesson and no one would confess to it!

I have read that corporal punishment in the schools back in my native country has lessened up some, but still exists. Additionally, with the widespread penetration of the internet and video/photo technology, the instances of teachers abusing their power has significantly decreased, as illustrated in this funny GIF from haha.nu:

My sister and I were generally well-behaved kids. So while our parents did hit us on a few occasions, it was only when we were really really bad, and these times were far and few between.

J, on the other hand, was a very rebellious and unruly child. My MIL tells us that he and his brother used to make her cry almost every day with their uncontrollable behavior, and that they were hit quite often with canes of varying sizes. (She jokes that this is the reason she is happy we are having two girls — raising two disorderly boys has traumatized her! 😉 )

With our personalities being so dissimilar, J and I have talked at length regarding the disciplining of our children. The short answer? We are both for physical discipline. This is not to say that we will be hitting our children for every offense. Rather, we will only do so when they are very very bad. We will take care never to take it too far, and only do it in the privacy of our home. (Hopefully our children will grow up to be relatively well-behaved, like my sister and I were!)

We also know that I will act as the every day disciplinarian and that J will only step in for the large wrongdoings. We also believe that after a certain age, physical punishment will not be as effective and so we will need to stop.

We both are fully aware that there are many families who would never lay a hand on their children. And we do not believe that one style of parenting is better than the other — like almost all parenting decisions, we all have to make the best decision for our unique family. And for us, we feel that large offenses deserve physical punishment (of course, our views may change depending on the personalities of our children, underlying circumstances, etc).

I still remember the very last time that my sister and I were about to get hit. Our father had rounded us up after dinner, and we knew that we were most likely in for some hits on our palms due to our recent behavior. However, our father calmly told us that he was disappointed in us…but that he was more disappointed in himself because he had failed as a father. He then went on to hit himself on the palms of his hands with the stick that we thought was meant for us.

That, to us, hurt more than anything else.

We continued to have our rebellious moments (especially during our teenage years), but we were never hit again.

(Seriously. Isn’t my dad the best or what?)

Were you hit as a child? Are you for or against corporal punishment?

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Jul 13, 2011  •  In Art/Design, Entertainment, Movies

Inside the Architecture and Sets of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2

Unless you’ve been living under a rock, you are probably well aware that the Harry Potter film franchise will come to a conclusion this Friday. J and I probably won’t be able to watch the movie until next weekend due to a lack of a babysitter, but you can bet that we are eagerly awaiting the last film with great anticipation.

Lucky for us, the web has been jam-packed with Harry Potter tributes and celebrations. One of my favorites thus far is Architectural Digest‘s interview with Academy Award–winning production designer Stuart Craig, the man who helped bring J.K. Rowling’s vision to life.

Here are some of the pictures included in the interview. Click on over for descriptions and even more eye candy.

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Jul 13, 2011  •  In Personal, Relationships

Learning to Balance (Opposites Attract)

J is finally back from his business trip, and I couldn’t be happier.  :mrgreen:

This was the first time in years that we had spent a night apart, so being away from each other for three nights was plain torture. We had promised each other that we would video chat every night via Skype, but you know what happened to my computer.  😥  I really wanted to cry when I first saw him this morning, and I’m not just saying this because I know he will read this.

And to show my appreciation for him, J returned home to a…

To-do list on the fridge for him.

I know! Aren’t I such a great wife?

Later in the day, when I jokingly nagged him about the list, he (very rightfully) asked, “Can’t I just get a day to rest on my day off???”

I’m pretty sure that if you ask J what one of his biggest annoyances about me is, he would tell you that I need to chill sometimes. That everything is not imperative, that non-emergency situations can wait, that I need to take things slower and enjoy life once in a while. (That to-do list on the fridge? I would’ve taken care of them myself a long time ago only if I were tall enough to do them.)

I know this, because one of my biggest annoyances about him is that I feel he needs to stop being so relaxed about everything and get things done ASAP, before everything starts piling up and/or we forget about it until it’s too late.

J and I have many, many things in common. We are both computer geeks who are obsessed with Star Wars. We both love professional basketball and football (we have rooted for the same teams — the Knicks and the Ravens — even before we met) but aren’t that into college sports. We are both musicians who play various instruments in addition to belting it out on karaoke with a good beer in our hands.

The list goes on and on.

But personality-wise, we couldn’t be more different. J is a true extrovert through and through, while I am one of the biggest introverts you will ever meet. He is very personable — the type of person who can become your new BFF in just one night — while I have the social skills of a gnat. J loves to joke around, and I am much more pensive and serious. He lives life in a carpe diem manner when I like to plan and think out everything. He sees the glass as half-full while I’m sure most of my readers are well aware that I tend to be a pessimist.

There are certain types of personalities where, if you put two people together with the same type of dispositions, they will mesh very well together. “We are so alike…it’s like I met my long-lost twin AND best friend!”

Then there are types of personalities where two people with similar characteristics may end up hating each other. (I am actually quite certain that if I were to meet someone with the same personality as me, I probably will not like him/her very much.) Or, when two people with completely different temperaments predictably do not get along.

I think that I have gotten very lucky in that J and I have many preferences in common, but our personalities are complete opposites that complement each other very well. He helps me get more out of life and see the bright side. I keep him grounded and focused. And by doing so, we make each other better people.

It’s funny, because J and his brother W are complete opposites…in fact, W’s personality is very very similar to mine. What makes this even more interesting (and perhaps a bit freudian?) is that W’s wife is very much like J. Whenever the four of us get together, it’s not unusual for J and my SIL to be joking around while W and I sit there rolling our eyes at them.

If you are in a relationship, are you in the “opposites attract” type? Or were you and your significant other drawn to each other for your similarities?

(The photos from this post were from our engagement session, shot by our wedding photographer Danny Weiss.)

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Jul 12, 2011  •  In Entertainment, Funny

The Law & Order: SVU Drinking Game

I wonder which would get you drunk faster: this or the “But Um” game from HIMYM?

Via Miss Cellania.

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Jul 12, 2011  •  In Baby, Comang, Funny

Sleeping Dog

I guess today is a doggy post day!

I have to say that I completely sympathize with the dog’s owner…and I’m sure I will empathize even more after BebeDeux is born.

(Comang feels the same way too. When Claire is being especially loud or obnoxious, he will let out a big sigh and go into our room — where it’s dark and quieter — to take a nap.)

Via Reddit.

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Jul 12, 2011  •  In Comang, Home

Eye Boogers on Our Walls!

Meet Comang.


An old picture of our shih-tzu, before (like my husband likes to say)
his “manhood was taken away”

He may never pee or poop in the house. But he likes to leave his mark in other ways.

How? By smearing his eye boogers all over our walls and moldings.

I present to you exhibits A and B for your consideration:

 

We first discovered these markings a few months after we adopted him two years ago. It’s a pretty smart move if you think about it — why use his clumsy and sharp-nail-filled paws to remove his eye boogers, when it’s easier to drag the side of your face against the wall and the molding around each door?

But it’s kinda gross too.

I cleaned our walls and moldings the best I could, and in order to discourage him from continuing this nasty habit I started to diligently clean his eyes every day.

But he continues to do this. I don’t know if it’s become a habit or what, but he refuses to stop (and many times, he’ll do it while we are not looking).

Does anyone have any suggestions on how we can get him to stop?

And  if anyone can chime in with the best way to clean this solidified gunk from our walls and moldings, I’d really appreciate it too.  🙂

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